32 White House Employees Hospitalized After Drinking Game

Today, 32 members of the White House’s staff have been suspended for being drunk at work after a drinking game gone wrong.

“It was a mistake. I’ll admit it”, Sarah G. one of the employees says. “We were complaining this morning about how hard work was when Garfield, one of my colleagues, mentioned that he had a bottle of vodka in his desk. He suggested that we played a drinking game. Every time the President said or wrote “Crooked Hilary”, we had to have a shot”.

At first, the coworkers weren’t too eager but Garfield offered a week at his parent’s house in Hawaii for the winner.

“You have to understand us, we need holidays and you don’t refuse a free week in Hawaii”, Sarah says. “The President started his day at 10.30, we thought it would be a short, easy day. By 11, we had had 7 drinks. At that point, we were still alright, it made our jobs more bearable actually”.

By noon, they had had 13 drinks. Some of them had already collapsed but the others didn’t want to abandon. By 2 pm, a cleaner found the 32 employees passed out and called ambulances.

“We can’t remember how much we had to drink. The doctors estimated 22-27 shots. It was a stupid idea! We should have decide to drink every time the president said something smart or did his job, it would have been safer”.

Sarah still thinks her suspension is unfair.

“We work for Donald Trump, who can blame us for drinking?”