Rumpelfus Decides to Never Lick his Balls Again

London, UK – Rumpelfus, 2 years old, was enjoying his Sunday morning walk in Hyde Park with his human, Pamela, 26, when his life suddenly changed, for the best. He has now decided never to lick his balls again.

“I stopped to lick my balls, as you do. That is when I heard Pamela asking “what are you doing, Rump, come on”. And it hit me. What AM I doing? Why am I doing this? It is about time I grow up and stop licking my genitals and my butt in public” Rumpelfus explains.

Once his decision was made, nothing could stop Rumpelfus.

“I got my head out of there. I stood up proudly and took this decision. I am done licking my balls. I will make Pamela proud to walk me. Every single day”

“I feel amazing. I have so much more energy and time to myself. I really wonder why I didn’t make this decision earlier. Obviously, there are tough days but I won’t change my mind” Rumpelfus says.

“I can finally say it with confidence. I am, Pamela. I am the good boy”

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